Questions your dog will never ask you

I read somewhere that 37% of all American homes have a dog and the average dog owner has 2 dogs. America has always had a love affair with our pets for countless reasons. This is information that, if you are a dog person you already know. I didn't realize how special the relationship is that we share with our dogs until I began traveling to third world countries and seeing how animals are treated in other parts of the world. Why do we Americans have such deep emotions for the little four legged members of our families?

Our pets give us something most of us realize we will never truly get from another human being... unconditional love. Don't get me wrong, I love the humans in my life and the people I am closest to could do just about anything and I would still love them, but only a pet will give you true unconditional love just the way you are with no regrets. Following is a list of the questions your dog will NEVER ask you which proves he/she loves you for you and not for what you have to offer them.

1. Where is this relationship going?

2. How much did that awesome dress cost?

3. Did you think you could just go off and leave me with the sitter for a month and I was gonna just let you walk back through that door like nothing happened?

4. You smell like another dog... where have you been... get out

5. Do you think you really need that piece of pie/cake/candy/hot fudge sundae/cheesecake?

6. Are we "exclusive" or can I see other humans?

7. What is in this relationship for me?

8. Are you putting on a little weight?

9. Are you just gonna leave those dishes in the sink until I do them?

10. Are you gonna just lay around in your pj's again today?

11. Can you not stand so close to me in the morning before you brush your teeth?

12. Really... did you have to fart?... I am sitting right here!

13. Really?... Dog food again?

14. Don't you have anything better to do than to hang out and bother me today?

15. Shouldn't you be working out more?

My dogs don't judge me, they don't care how long I have been gone as long as I come back, every time I walk in the door they shower me with unconditional love and gratitude. Even the most pure human relationship cannot give you that all of the time. My dog is just happy as can be to curl up in my smelly workout clothes on while I am taking a shower because she likes to be with me and they smell like me... if you find a human who loves you that much... be afraid.